angeldoesstuff:

Angel’s old pal Spike is in town! Here they are just sharing a few laughs over a $2 bottle of wine. Behave yourselves, boys!

I wish I’d had the ingenuity to think up something this special when I was unemployed. I just spent a lot of time eating popcorn and thinking up creative ways to pad out my dole diary.

Donna & Sam’s Top Tips: How to Get a Guy to Approach You

1. Men are much less frightened when you express your personality through brightly coloured accessories, rather than having opinions and interests and sharing them.

2. Having a rich and fulfilling life of your own is unattractive. Move slowly at all times so it’s easier for men to chase you down and drag you back to the cave by your hair.

3. Don’t wear too much makeup. Instead, be “naturally” smooth, hair and blemish free. 

4. Independence, resourcefulness and self-sufficiency are total turn offs. Have no idea how to do anything, ever.

5. Stare blankly into space in public until a man talks to you. You’ll have to give up your friends once you meet a man anyway, so start drifting away now and save the ugly scenes later.

Mel wrote about her recent foray into consumer letter writing, and it reminded me of the time I wrote to Attiki Yoghurt on my flatmate’s behalf. She couldn’t get over the fact that her favourite type of yoghurt wasn’t on the shelves any more, kept protesting that it was the only yoghurt she’d ever loved (women and their yoghurt, am I right guys?), so I penned this on her behalf:

Hello, 

I was wondering if you could help me track down one of your products. I am an avid fan of your Country Style yoghurt, in particular the Reduced Fat Strawberry variety. In fact I would venture to say that it is my favourite type of yoghurt! But I have had increasing difficulty in finding it in stores, to the fact that it seems to have disappeared from the shelves. Would you be able to provide me with a stockist list, or suggest some other way that I can ensure a steady supply of Attiki Country Style? I’m not quite sure that I can live without it!
Yours sincerely,
Heather

This is an automatically generated Delivery Status Notification

Delivery to the following recipient failed permanently:

    admin@attiki.com.au

betterbooktitles:

Reader Submission: Title and Redesign by funnyman Mike Lacher of WONDER-TONIC.

Strunk and White: The Elements of Style.

Pshaw. Those bosoms are barely heaving. (I love the attention to detail on the outfits - that green jumpsuit is inspired.)

Mills & Boon | Oli + Alex

“…Vivian Maier, a street photographer from the 1950s - 1990s. Vivian’s work was discovered at an auction here in Chicago where she resided most of her life. Her discovered work includes over 100,000 mostly medium format negatives, thousands of prints, and countless undeveloped rolls of film.”

Vivian Maier - Her Discovered Work

Really dumb things make me laugh sometimes (all the times).

politicsandlamingtons:

At first Tony Abbott didn’t even notice Homosexuality, so engrossed was he in his Enid Blyton. In his imagination he was far away from the rattling train carriage, adventuring under the Magic Faraway Tree with Fanny and Dick and all the rest. He tenderly stroked the age-softened page. “Oh,…